Thursday, May 26, 2011

everyone is allotted a post like this every so often

School is kicking my ass... and like every good college student I've decided to blog instead of do my homework.

Today has sucked. The computers were down at my work which caused more than my daily amount of stress, this bag-o-douche man kept me on the phone for 20 minutes after we closed to educate me on a law that not only doesn't apply to him or his situation, but also comes from a third party I'm positive had no business sharing. I hate when people are glad they could "teach me something today". Because my day is obviously filled with so many moments of non-learning I should be so dammed thankful for his help.

I hate chauvinists. I hate men who think they know everything. I hate people who belittle me or mock me or treat me as though I'm any less of a person based on my age or my gender or the fact that I'm their girlfriend and let them get away with far too much far too often.

Tom also royally screwed up tonight.

He is hurtful, and he is oblivious.

He also doesn't listen and doesn't take any responsibility for the words he says or how they make me feel.

I have too much work to do to keep wasting time blogging about how upset I am. Tomorrow is my last day this week, and it couldn't come soon enough.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

blame it on the booze

My little sister told me the other day I need to blog more... and because she is taller than I am and a little scary, I have to do what she says.

In light of recent events in my life that I haven't blogged about, I shall continue with the 30 days of truth, and I'll start with a few little stories.

1. I actually turned in a paper yesterday saying this:
 It was a paper about budgeting and where my money goes, so it was okay that I wrote this (see why teachers love me? I keep them on their toes), but it's true. I waste money on drinking.
Alcohol: another big dollar waster. I am not going to stop drinking, that is silly; I am only twenty-two, but I need to not go out as much. Drinking-out is exponentially more expensive than drinking-in, and when you drink-in you do not risk you or anyone you love deciding to drive intoxicated. Drinking-in is smart and fiscally responsible. I will not be drinking out any time in the near future.

2. I got very drunk a few weeks ago and kept calling someone named Caleb, Kyle.
Yes it was because I couldn't get him off my mind, yes drinking makes me randy and being randy makes me think of him, yes, Caleb is Tom's friend which means every time I did it I got a look from him that was a mix of anger and being hurt. Not to mention that during this drunken evening I kissed Merry and made out with her ear and neck area, in front of everyone. Sometimes I just don't know about myself.

3. A few more weeks ago I went to a bar with Merry to celebrate her being-twenty-one-ness. Not so long into the evening I was unable to find her because a) I was drunk at this point even though I tried not to because I was driving home and b) she had found a gentleman suitor who major fancied her and had her up against a wall (don't worry, she liked it) and was making friends all over the place (and goo goo eyes at some cuties who were making goo goo eyes back.) I was also dancing with people I don't even remember their names, some guy tried to take me home, the bouncer (who I may or may not have previously made out with once or twice) kept taking my modesty bandanna (modesty: the bandanna covers my too much cleavage when I wear low cut shirts) and turning it around so that it was no longer helping me keep the girls under cover. I made out with some girls neck so she would give me a cigarette, then I made out with her ear so she'd give me a light... then I flirted with the bar tender and got free drinks for me and my smoking friend.

Needles to say, I'm a fucking class act when I drink, and while I am not entirely proud of all of these moments, they provide good blog material and even better stories to tell the next time I get drunk.

So, how do I feel about drugs and alcohol?

Alcohol is my friend. It makes me happy and lets me forget how to be normal. When I am uncomfortable (say, all those first dates I went on back in my match dot com days) a drink or three makes me even funnier than I already am and less nervous to talk to people. It also makes me warm, and coming from an Ohio girl, trust me, you can't put a price on being warm.

Alcohol also makes other people funnier, and society less tragic. I laugh so much when I drink, and since I've been drinking people don't know its at them. I love people when I drink, sober I just feel sad for them.

But I do not think that under age people should drink. That includes you little sister. I'm old enough and smart enough to know my limits, know when things could potentially get dangerous and therefore leave, and am not suffering from Misunderstood Youth Syndrome (that thing angsty teens have between 14 and 20ish where their parents are idiots and no one wants them to be happy or understands them) so I am not reckless when I drink for the sake of being reckless. I am legally allowed to drink, which also means that I run no risk of getting in trouble for having a drink in my hand (provided I am not walking down the middle of the street) and I know how to keep my legs closed and my shirt on, (and if I decided to not do those things, I'm fully aware of the consequences so I make damn sure there is a condom between me and whoever’s boy part I decide to play with for the evening).

I don't regret my decisions, I don't drive intoxicated, I am older and wiser, and that is why 16 year olds are not allowed to drink.

Booze are fun, in moderation and with intelligence, as long as the individual has a real horizontal drivers license.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

how do you like the new header?

Obviously I've done a lot today...

with the new header and all...

and class and stuff...

You know, the classes I'm taking right now aren't that hard. I have all my homework done for this week, and I had it done yesterday. I'm trying to get ahead though, so I still study. Getting ahead now prevents me from getting behind in the future.

Look at me, all philosophical and stuff.

Good news: Ellen is home. Finally, the heavens have opened up and allowed me to have my best friend back. Tom makes me happy. I spent a significant amount of time with his mother this weekend, and I think she likes me. Really, it's important to me that she likes me, his dad is whatever. I'm pretty sure his dad hates women, so I will just be normal around him, and if he likes me than we win, if he doesn't nothing changes.

Tom's mother is my new favorite person. She is a strong woman, and smart and funny and I love her. I say that with no hesitation. She loves her family, she knows that she is absolutely vital for the function of it and she doesn't take crap from Tom's dad (and he dishes it out, did I mention he may be a male chauvinist?) (My dad is too, but he loves us and that's all that matters to me).

Tom's mom is amazing; it makes perfect sense why I like her son. And, Tom's little sister is also wonderful. I don't know his brother too well, but from what I do know I like. I'm not saying anything more than the actual words on the paper screen, but I really like being with Tom and his family, and if I had to chose someone to be close to their family, Tom's is pretty boss.

David's family made me feel weird, I liked Dan and Alyssa, but his dad made my uncomfortable, and his mother... I can't describe it. I think she just always wanted to be her son's number one, she saw no room for me.

I think Tom's mother has come to the conclusion that since her son loves being in relationships so much (Tom is never single, like, ever) that he will eventually decide to be with someone... she doesn't see his girlfriends as a threat, she sees them as people who make her son happy, and therefore make her happy.

Monday, May 2, 2011

first day of school: down

Today was my first day, I had one class that began at 10:30 and I was almost late because Tom drove my car yesterday and put my emergency break on, I never freaking use my emergency break, and it too me 6 minutes of trying to push it down before I realized you must pull it up a bit before you can push it down.

Sometimes I revel in my womanhood and am proud of my vagina, others... not so much.

So, about school, I wasn't late, just barely on time actually. I am lucky that I am anal-retentive when it comes to being on time places, because if I wasn't I would have been five minutes later, but I was freaking out hard in my car trying to get the break to turn off. Sometimes my life is just so embarrassing when I'm alone, I need to tell people about it.

I get there just on time to find that my first class is mega full, it's a computer class and there are only a few left open in the entire class. We talk about what we're going to learn, I'm pretty sure I already know everything, I made a few friends... and the day was over. We didn't really do anything, I am super tired because of how bored I was, and now I'm back at work blogging and waiting for five o'clock so I can see Thomas.

Tom got switched back to days and while I'm really happy about it, I was sort of looking forward to never having to worry about keeping him entertained during the week. Now that he and I will basically have the same schedule again, I'm worried that he'll be more of a temptation that I was prepared to deal with. We'll see, I just like him a lot.... it's hard to say no.

We went golfing yesterday for the first time, it was hard, but I think I'm getting better. My arms hurt so much though, golfing is not easy, I'll tell you that. Hopefully I get amazing and can beat him and then hold that over his head forever, or not. I'm not very competitive, it's what makes me so nice.

Hopefully tomorrow will me more entertaining, because I like to learn, and I like to be entertained.