Tuesday, January 4, 2011

I like the dark blue

I have been changing the look of my blog every other minute for a bit now and I am sorry for that, I need to find something and just stick with it... but, I can't find a good header photo and my computer is filled with mostly pictures of recipes... and I don't think that this blog is a good place for food photos, although I do love the way this looks.

Yes, I just whored out my cooking blog. I am glad you clicked on it. :)

Anyway, if you can think of a photo that is awesome or of something that reminds you of me that I should take a picture of... holla at me yo. I'm trying to make this blog feel like home. Maybe I should use a picture of pillows, I love pillows.

I wore sweat pants this morning to work tucked into boots. And by boots I mean leopard print slipper boots with a rubber bottom that I wear outside when the ground isn't wet. The weather has been pretty chilly here, but the snow melted last week and there is no water on the ground so slippers outside are completely acceptable. I think.

I just sent the longest email of my life to Ellen. It's impressive that she left yesterday and it's been maybe 27 hours since I've seen her and I can write her a book. I do have skill in the talking area. And, since a million and one things happened last night, I feel like that is perfectly acceptable.

David and I are taking some time apart... for our sanity, and for our relationship. Whatever exactly you classify it under.

 He thinks he relies on me too much, and I agree. I think he doesn't appreciate me enough. He agrees. We both think that time apart will help us break out of this thing we are which is somewhere between dating and not. It's a really confusing place that involves spending lots of time together, one on one time, sleeping in the same bed often, saying, "I love you" on an almost daily basis, and not ever even kissing. We are basically dating, without all the hankey pankey stuff and I didn't really realize it till Kyle said it, and then David said it. It's true. We were everything for each other that a significant other would be sans the physical stuff. Emotionally, we were hooked. Are hooked. I'm obviously still hooked on him.

The most important thing that was discussed yesterday was us, the future us. He asked me where I wanted to be with him and I said that in 10 years I wanted to be married with no children living in Oregon. I want him because through internet dating and the whole 5 people I've met (and the slew of crap that I've decided not to meet) I've realized that he's perfect. We love all the same things, but also have out own interests that can keep us occupied and not too involved in the others life, we agree on almost everything from politics to religion, we have fun and it's easy. With him my heart is content, and there really doesn't seem to be someone out there who'll do it for me like David does.

attn: This does not mean I'm going to stop looking. match dot com is fun, I've met some great people, some crazies, yes, but friends too. Not every internet crush pans out to be love when you meet in person. And that's okay. I'm still looking to find love, the internet seems like the most logical place to do that still. 

I told him that whenever he started to date someone else he'd have a great time for the first few months, and then he'd realize that everything that was missing in his relationship was me. He'd see soon enough that the reason we are the way we are is because we rock hard core together and no one will do for him what I do for him. He said that no matter how true that was, he wanted to find out for himself, which I respect. I want him to be happy just like I want me to be happy, and I know that no matter what happens we'll find some way to be involved in each others lives; I think we just really need this time apart to remember why we love each other and to see that there is no reason to not be together.

He said that if it's meant to be he wants to fall back in love with me; to feel a spark again. To forget why he wants me so much and then have me remind him.

It's almost like a Nicholas Sparks novel... I hope I don't get cancer.

With Ellen in Geneva and David and I limiting our contact for a while, I'm on the market for a new best friend. Those interested may submit and application in person or online, please attach a head shot.

Requirements: laughs at my jokes. Humors me, often. Reads Harry Potter. Likes gay people. Enjoys the occasional drink. Is willing to listen to me talk about my poop.

And thinks stuff like this is hilarious and therefore sends me pictures of them .

Photo credit: my sister

Top Gear is too wonderful not to love.


  1. "It's almost like a Nicholas Sparks novel... I hope I don't get cancer."

    I just choked on my soup. With laughter.

  2. Good Luck with David. I have been in a very similar situation, however it didn't work out the way I had hoped. My ex does admit we were perfect for each other, but he is now convinced we can't be together. Perhaps it is his pride and facing my family where he is a coward - and if that is it, well, I hope David will follow his true heart back to you.

  3. Hm.. interesting situation with David. My experience is that guys who need time to think about things are generally idiots and that should be a sign that you need to immediately move on. Granted, on occasion you can end up growing closer by allowing some distance, but the whole excuse of needing time in order to secure the status of a relationship in my book is LAME.

    I know you really like the guy, but if I were you (and this is totally just my advice and I won't take any offense if you hate it/don't want it) I would just completely move on!!! You are hot and young- don't waste your youth!

    :) Good luck with the situation though- I know you will keep us posted!


  4. PS- I think I kind of sound like an old lady, but I spent like 3 years with a jerk, and it's something I regret (but not really b/c if it wasn't for the jerky ex I wouldn't have met my fiance).

  5. Got to love Harry Potter - I better find a guy that at leasts likes reading and supports my novel writing :)

    "It's almost like a Nicholas Sparks novel... I hope I don't get cancer." --- This line, pure genius hahaha.

    I love Oregon - maybe we'll both be living there someday ;)


  6. Leopard print slipper boots?? I am wearing my pair of those right now.

    i am also in the market for a new best friend or 2. they should make a match.com kind of site except you get matched to your new BFF. that would be awesome. I would totally do that.

  7. Great Post and I think that you need to use pillows! You said you love pillows and I think a blog ought to be personal to you so use a pillow theme.

  8. The best blog skins are ones like yours, now: clear, clean and readable. But I'm a blogger purist. The text is what matters, not the frou frou.

    If the dude meets your (charming) requirements, then he's got to be worth a lot!

  9. Hey. I resent that you're trying to replace me.

    P.s.- I almost put 'your' just to piss you off, but I just couldn't do it...

  10. Well, I meet all of the requirements! I'll go ahead and send you my resume and hope that I get the interview for the best friend job.

  11. Dear Denise, It's Liz, that one girl Ellen knows. I just wanted to say, I love Top Gear. That is all. :)

  12. Why is it so difficult to find a guy who's response to 'Have you read Harry Potter' isn't 'Who? The magic dude?' ? That, to me, is a deal breaker.

  13. I stumbled 2 of your posts, because I think you're amazing too.

  14. when you strike a match, the fire goes out, hopefully after youve lit something a little less showy and a little more substantial.
    sparks fade in and out of relationships. i dont think its about maintaining a spark as much as knowing that even when you dont "feel" something, nothing has changed. love is work, and sometimes work is hard.
    whoever you end up with is one lucky guy.