Thursday, January 27, 2011

not exactly the way to my heart

I got asked out today by a fellow match dot com-er who I have officially been talking to for, wait for it...

One day.

He emailed me this morning asking for my phone number, I emailed him back giving it to him and we've been texting for approximately and hour and a half...

5 texts later he asked me to dinner.

Naturally I accepted. I love dinner.

But here is where he rubbed me wrong:

him: Do you have class or work today? (I'm re-reading your profile now)

What he actually means by re-reading is reading. For the first time. Because he admitted in his original email that he had just skimmed my profile.

me: I'm not in school right now because I originally started out studying music Education and decided two years in, it wasn't for me. Now I'm ready to go back and will be studying nursing starting in May but I won't know if I'm accepted into the program (30 people per session get accepted) till March but because I'm brilliant I should have no problem. That and my good looks.

him: Intelligence idk yet. But looks I agree :-)

First of all, I hate IDK, just like I hate BTW and people (my sister, the English teacher) who say them out loud. Secondly, please do not tell me you're finally re-reading my profile after asking me for my number, then tell me you think I'm hot but you don't think I'm smart.

I'm very smart. I try not to be annoyingly smart when I talk to people because no one wants to hear about statistics and facts about the brain over a few cocktails even though that's all I'm thinking about. If a guy doesn't appreciate me for my brain it doesn't matter how cute he thinks I am.

I've never dated a guy before who wanted me to be his arm candy (mostly because I'm mildly to moderately outspoken and usually say something inappropriate because it's hilarious and I like to make people squirm). I will never be any ones arm candy. I may have arm candy in the future when I am a billionaire from writing a book or singing something really well, or possibly this blog gets as famous as the pioneer woman's or something... but arm candy is such a waste of time.

I've never slept with someone more than once that I found to be anything less than intelligent and hilarious.

I have two standards. You must be smart and you must be funny.

 If I get to choose you'll have glasses and be over 6ft tall.

If I really really get to choose you'll have dark hair and green eyes so we can make little baby clones of ourselves.

Basically all I ask is that you like me for the reasons I like me. And don't downplay how important my intelligence is. I'm not looking for a guy who doesn't value my opinions and input.

 And never say IDK... ugh.


  1. IDK is almost worst than saying 'u' instead of 'you'. Yeesh. I'm totally with you on that one. Lame.

  2. I think you hate me know because I say idk and btw...ahhh! I may go cry now...Please still love me!

    And this guy sounds tool-ish. I m know I'm an ocean away, but I still can smell an asshole from far away. lol! At least you get to go to dinner! (Get a Strongbow ;) )

  3. I wouldn't mind talking about statistics over cocktails. Stats were my favorite part of my political science classes. Also, I can't stand lol, mostly because it is overused.

  4. OMG! This was such a cute post!

    Good luck with the new guy. TTYL!

  5. I say beeteedubs outloud. Feel free to hate me now. :(

    I get what he was trying to do there, like I see it, but it wasn't very successful.

  6. "Basically all I ask is that you like me for the reasons I like me." Fucking love it, Denise. Awesome.

  7. IDK, 4 instead of for, people who don't know the difference between to, too and two, or your and you're.... all pet peeves.

    Yes, intelligence is important. I once stopped seeing a guy because when the possibility of watching a subtitled movie came up he said, and I quote: "I don't watch subtitled films. If I wanted to read, I'd read a book".

  8. Ugh, that would rub me the wrong way too. I could never be somebodys arm candy. Haha. I have way too much of a personality just like you do. Im glad you have good standards for yourself. :)

    <3Chelsea Elizabeth

  9. I can't believe he downplayed your intelligence like that... I would be so pissed off! I don't think anyone that uses IDK has any right to question someone's intelligence, seriously! I think you should be annoyingly smart around him, and, possibly also be really smug about it, because, that is ridiculous.

  10. he sounds like a major jerk and a total waste of time, energy, and atoms...

  11. This made me LMFAO! Ugh... I tried to be funny, but it's soooo early. Seriously though, this is a funny story with some great one liners!