Tuesday, November 23, 2010

We're alone

I am only going to talk about Harry Potter for one (or two) more post(s) because I saw it again last night  and my last name is Potter so I can do what I want!

There are a lot of really moving things, Hermione leaving her parents house, the grave yard, Fred when George's ear gets hexed off, Hermione telling Ron her and Harry are nothing, the dancing scene... I loved every minute of it. But, all three times I've seen it there is one moment that hits home a little harder than I anticipated.

I do normally try to relate at least one thing in my life to Harry Potter per day, it gives me a sense of completeness that can't be matched. But this, this moment, it hurt.

The scene is where the three of them enter Grimmauld Place, the dust in the hall begins to stir and a figure looking like Dumbledor yells while speeding toward them with an outstretched hand. The figure dissolves. The room is quiet. Hermione checks for any other tricks and there is nothing. No one.

She says, "we're alone."

And they are.

Completely alone.

Sometimes I feel like that. No one is where I am right now and no one can understand me. I feel like I am the only one fighting for myself a lot of the time, and the people in my life who I should be able to lean on and confide in are uncaring, and uninterested.

I'm not important enough.

I don't matter.

I'm alone.

I feel like for a really long time I have only had two people that I can really talk to, because everyone else just looks at me and has no idea what I am talking about and doesn't really care or feel like putting forth the effort. Considering everything that has been happening, and for how long I've been feeling this way, two people really isn't very much; especially considering they aren't my family and shouldn't have to help me carry all this emotional baggage like they so generously have.

My family sucks right now, and I have no place to just be me. I can't go home without feeling smothered, (not in a loving way, in a nagging, noisy, I'm in the way way) and when you can't go home where can you go?

Poor Harry Potter... He fought such a fight.


  1. Such a great post (Don't worry I have like ten posts about HP) I saw it again the other night.. seriously love it. The movie just is so emotional.. but I totally get what your saying about the "We're alone." It defines them quite well really. It's always been the 3 of them. They have stuck together from the beginning.. and even tho there were outside sources that helped them like Lupin, Sirius, Dumbledore... they overtime disappeared. So it was the 3 of them once again. Least they have each other. No wonder Hermione was beyond brokenhearted when Ron left; not only is she falling in love with him, but it's the first time the 3 were split up.

    I know how you feel tho.. because I feel it a lot of the time as well...

  2. You aren't a burden. Just remember that! I'm always here for ya babe! And you can come here anytime you want and camp out in my basement if my mom and I are home, or you can crash on the couch if we aren't. Or you can come visit, but I know you need some "me time."

    I love you!!! :)