When I originally typed my title it came out as Funkin' and I considered leaving it. I changed it because I thought it was too close to the real thing and people would think I'm dumb, and not just the terrible typer that I am. I can't type for beans, and that's saying something cuz beans are basically nothing. So I typed it as Effin' because I felt bad about swearing and I really do say effin' in regular speech since I'm a puss when it comes to bad language except when for Bastard, which is my favorite cuss word by far. I finally decided on F*in because if you read it it's effin, but you know what I was trying to say without being totally crass. One swear word per title is enough, for me, for today anyways.
Today is the last day I will be sitting in front of a computer pretending to work until next Monday, because I'm leaving on a bus for the Large Apple in about a day... I'm not coming to work tomorrow which means my weekend will be one day longer, and although I will spend that day on a possibly smelly bus, it'll be better than working. Duh.
I also got paid today and that is doubly perfect because at the moment my bank account says something along the lines of $6... and I need new sun glasses, a mini contact solution, and chocolate chips to make cookies to bring to Adrienne. Am I lame for loving chocolate chip cookies the best?
I feel like you can never go wrong with the c-chips of glory. I may even make them half chocolate chip half peanut butter chip, except I doubt that any would make it all the way there unless I store them under the bus but then I won't be able to protect them and that's no good. I need to protect them. Have I told you how much I love peanut butter? It's my favorite. Have you ever had peanut butter chicken? So freaking good.
once again I had to water that down to make me feel better about myself. I went to private school, I have Lutheran guilt.
I remember being in girl scouts in about 4th grade and being at camp. Girl scout camp is not like regular camp by the way, the cabins are really nice, you get extra mattresses if you want them, and we always seemed to get the one with a handicap bathroom in it that we just picked the lock and had a flush toilet. Latrines are the most stupid thing on the planet. If they were made out of plastic you could at least hose them down and get them clean, since they are made of wood you can never really get the smell out, and poop is gross when it's someone else's. Besides latrines being sucky, we were all at the age where saying "freaking" was totally boss. I said it all the time. And I felt freaking sweet doing so. However, since I went to a Lutheran school we all kept getting in trouble for saying it, because it was a "substitute", and God knew what we meant that was just as bad. I'm pretty sure 6 or 7 of us were not allowed to talk for 15 minutes or something because we all kept saying it too much.
Another time in 6th grade the boys, who had their own gang called the Knights (kuh-niggets) kept saying "son of a biscuit" and they got in trouble for it too. We had to have a talk as a class, my 6th grade class got in so much trouble, our teacher hated us. Once we decided not to cheer at an all school pep rally (all school being all 240 or so kids that went there pre-k through 8th) and our teacher wouldn't talk to us after that. She wrote us a note on the board about how embarrassed she was of us and how we were not allowed to go to the next pep rally. At Mohican, the week long camp we went to, I have no idea what we did, but we had to take out free time again and have another one of those talks about how embarrassing we were and how we were a shame compared to the other good Lutheran kids. Obviously grade school was a good experience for me.
I had such bad handwriting my mother made me do practice books in the summer, and my 4th grade teacher had to have me read my assignments to her sometimes... and she was used to reading shitty 4th graders handwriting. In 5th grade me and 2 other girls got in huge trouble for writing an "inappropriate" letter of pick up lines that somehow my teacher found and told us if we couldn't be more mature we wouldn't be allowed to take sex ed anymore. That was embarrassing. In 7th grade the girls in my class (I need here to say that "class" means the 17 kids in my grade, it was a small school) were in a huge fight and once again, as a class, we had to talk about why we had a problem with each other. Not that that is professional at all because what is a small qualm between a few people should not have to be discussed in front of everyone, especially people who are not involved.
Grade school wasn't all bad, in fact I got my first tongue kiss in 7th grade at the school picnic behind the bathrooms ;)
I was super good at sports because there wasn't anyone to challenge me and I was on student council. I got all the solos in choir, I was a team captain for Volley ball, a starter for basket ball and I was on the softball team where I got to her my coach/8thgrade teacher call my friends mom a Bitch... that was hilarious. He asked me not to tell anyone, I obviously did. Why wouldn't I? Speaking of teachers with multiple roles, my algebra teacher was also my principal, and my gym teacher was also the band director (he was a male cheerleader in HS and played the guitar... obviously he was overqualified)
Most people have an awful middle-school experience, but I'm guessing that since I knew all the same kids from kindergarten on that it wasn't that bad. I remember doing horribly embarrassing things after discovering AIM and some of the terrible dresses my mother made me wear to talent shows that for some reason were covered in cows.. I have a precious picture of me in that dress, I'll have to look for it. Speaking of talent shows, I sang a Britney Spears song one year, you drive me crazy... I rocked it in that cow dress. I also sang an A Capella version of God Bless America the show after 9/11. I sure do know how to milk it... ha ha, cow dress, milk it... Standing ovations in grade school is probably the reason I'm not that bitter.
Have I said anything about New York yet? I'm going there tomorrow, I've never been and I'm really excited. See you Monday!
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